Knickers

It was the much anticipated Girl Guide Jumble Sale this weekend. We were feeling rather blasé about the whole affair, being old hands and everything. Both us adults were given bric-a-brac tables to sell (I'm sure in the hierarchy of jumble sales thats 'up there'). However, sorting of the jumble needed to be done the evening before.

We got stuck in to the mountain of bin bags, shopping bags and falling apart assortment of cardboard boxes in which people had deposited their preloved treasures. All was going well, the guides all opted to 'sort' the toys, which as far as I could tell was find toys (1 minute), put on table (30 seconds), establish if toy was play-worthy (10 minutes). Their other objective was to retrieve anything  of theirs parents had donated! 

It fell to us sensible adults to properly sort everything else. I attacked the bags with gusto, first I attempted to look at the clothes, fold nicely and place on the table in t-shirt/blouse/skirt/trouser piles (a librarian through and through). This was soon overtaken by the necessity of just one pile, making sure it didn't fall off the table. I reassured myself with thoughts of "oh well, it will all be a mess within five minutes of the doors opening."

With my enthusiasm, and decreased standards, I emptied the next bag of clothes onto the floor for rough sorting purposes. This I instantly regretted. I was greeted with a load of multicoloured undies, bras, pants and socks! Who would donate those?! A Guide, almost as horrified as me, said - people actually buy them as well! She, however, was very un-Guide like and wouldn't help me handle the said garments to pile onto the table. I found a small box which could be used for display purposes and shoved everything into that. Thank goodness for hand sanitizer and availability of counselling around OCD issues.

The bric-a-brac tables looked great. We grabbed some early bargains (staff perks) and the Scout hut looked all set for the onslaught of bargain hunters.

Our bargains included jodhpurs for Maisie, a jug, a nice woollen blanket, and a singing mexican hamster in need of more batteries. NO Knickers; none at all. And the best bit - £270 raised for the Guides.

Blogger exposed

In the light of recent lesbian bloggers turning out to be blokes living in Scotland, it's only fair to come clean. The blog by Chess the dog, was not written by the dog himself, but by a lesbian living in Derbyshire. Please accept my sincerest apologies for misleading you into believing the dog can type, I promise not to do it again. The dog can't type, his capabilities are fairly limited, but he can run really fast - unlike the lesbian living in Derbyshire, she can only manage a slow jog.

X rated movie

We treated ourselves with a trip to the cinema, X Men the chosen movie. We took Maisie and my niece along too. The movie received mixed reviews, Maisie, Alex and myself - LOVED it, Leanne said "well that's 90 minutes of my life I'll never get back". I don't think my pretending to read everyone's mind, and control metal objects all the way home made the situation any better

I actually wanted to see Kung Fu Panda 2, but Maisie is not so keen, she is a little intimidated by my enthusiasm. I cant see what her problem is Panda + Kung Fu + Jack Black = Win 

Chess says: X men pah, I can hop, I should be in that Kung Fu movie at least, Kung Fu Greyhound, now there's a movie title.

Chess the wonderdog and his adventure

Well it's the guest blogger you have all been waiting for, woof.

I hopped in the back of the car today, expecting the usual sniffs and fleeting glimpses of these damn squirrels. But no, it was completely different. Woof.

We end up in a place with all these giant machine things,  trundling along metal strips. Firstly, they were weird; secondly, they made a strange noise; and thirdly, the dumb humans that live with me were dragging me inside one. Whine.

On the thing [tram]. Not so bad. Getting lots of attention (well I do deserve it) - ooh cheese.

Ooh  - a dropped dolly mixture, woof.

What's this? We're moving. OK, I get it, just need to concentrate on standing up, and everything will be good. At least I can see out the window. Some child, obviously feeling the same trepidation, stands next to me and holds on to me. Well that's OK, I think he has more dolly mixtures. Woof.

We stop, we wait, we go…..backwards, help! Please let it end. We stop, I leap off, phew. Ooh cheese.

A great walk through the woods, loads of lovely sniffs, a few giant ants - the one they call Rachel appears to be as afraid of them as I was of the thing [tram]. I hang around the swings for a bit, then wander over to look over the bridge. Big mistake. More of them things, with loads of people on top of them. What to do, what to do. Do I run down and save them? 


Do I shout out run for your lives? I settled for chattering jaws and whining. Humans took the hint and we went for a bit more of a walk, then back to the car, then home, my bed - ooh cheese. Woof

P.S. Check out my new collar.

[We went to Crich Tramway Village - Home of the National Tramway Museum - ed]