The only gay in the library

Well it's that time of year - time for the delayed by snow work Christmas party. I approached the party decision with a fair amount of trepidation. Colleagues were either wildly over enthusiastic or "I'm not going to a library party ever again". Unfortunately all of my team fell into the latter category. Undaunted by this, I felt it was necessary to sample the party for myself, I signed up, I had promises from non team colleagues that they would talk to me, what's the worst that could happen.

The evening arrived, the clean shirt was donned, and we were off down the road to the City Hall for the festivities. Upon arrival it was a nice touch to see a red carpet by the door. It wasn't so good to see a police car and an ambulance, blimey these Sheffield librarians obviously know how to get a party started, it was barely 7.15 pm. Fortunately the emergency vehicles were completely unrelated.

Drinks at the bar were very pleasant, we all clinked glasses and said Happy Christmas and Happy New Year in the spirit of the Christmas party. Then it was the dash to the tables in the ballroom. As far as I could tell, the objective was not to sit with the big boss, it's the same at every library party I've ever been to! Mission accomplished, seated with some lovely people, pleasant chatter ensued, a great evening. We had crackers to pull, stupid hats to wear, and even party poppers to pop. The candelabras on the tables with burning red candles was a nice touch, as was the bottles of wine on each table.

We drank, we were merry, we collected our Christmas dinner from the carvery, I'm fairly confident they hadn't just frozen the food from the cancelled date, the vegetables looked and tasted fairly fresh to me!

Then on came the 'entertainment'. This was a Russian (fake) accented bloke - Madame Galina - in a white tutu, who proceeded to do a ballet routine around the ballroom, pretty good, then came the audience participation. Asking people to help with his routine, he saw all the party poppers and mentioned it was like a gay club. Then he wanted to out all the gays, and asked all the gays to put their hands up. Me being a nice compliant girl, I dutifully raised my hand before I could think. Guess what - I was the only one! Madame then insulted my shirt, and I'd accidentally outed myself to the entire library - not that I mind, but it is my best shirt.